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Aug. 27th, 2008 10:09 am![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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2minsforslashingAN- For the
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10_hurt_comfort
challenge.
Title: Loneliness
Pairing: Nick Lidstrom/Tomas Holmstrom mention of Chris Osgood/Darren McCarty and Henrik Zetterberg/Pavel Datsyuk (RPS Detroit Red Wings)
Prompt: Loneliness
Rating: PG
Warning: Slight manipulation of timelines concerning the new Batman movie, possible spoilers for The Dark Knight
Disclaimer: The following is a work of not for profit fiction and no insult or assumption is implied by the use of the names of the persons therein. Read- It's just for fun and NOT REAL, no matter how fun the pictures would be.
Summary: Nick wishes he didn't feel so alone.
10_hurt_comfortchallenge.
Title: Loneliness
Pairing: Nick Lidstrom/Tomas Holmstrom mention of Chris Osgood/Darren McCarty and Henrik Zetterberg/Pavel Datsyuk (RPS Detroit Red Wings)
Prompt: Loneliness
Rating: PG
Warning: Slight manipulation of timelines concerning the new Batman movie, possible spoilers for The Dark Knight
Disclaimer: The following is a work of not for profit fiction and no insult or assumption is implied by the use of the names of the persons therein. Read- It's just for fun and NOT REAL, no matter how fun the pictures would be.
Summary: Nick wishes he didn't feel so alone.
Nick crossed his arms on the railing in front of him and leaned forward, watching his teammates in the lobby below. He did this a lot, separated himself and just observed, wishing he could be like them. Wishing he didn't feel the need to live up to the “Perfect Human” label they had tagged onto him. Wishing he didn't have to feel so alone.
Ozzie looked up, saw Nick, and motioned with his head. Nick smiled and shrugged in response. Oz flipped him off. Nick stuck his tongue out and proceeded downstairs. To an outsider, it may have looked like a random series of twitches and gestures. To Nick and Chris, however, it was an entire conversation.
“Nick, you should come down here, come on, I know you heard us planning, come out with us.”
“Eh, maybe. You sure you want me to come?”
“Of course you moron. Why else would I have asked? Get your ass down here.”
“Fine. Hang on I'll be right there.”
Ozzie crossed his arms and eyeballed his Captain as Nick walked across the lobby to join them. ”Hurry up; we'll miss the start of the movie!”
“You know full well Darren won't let them start it without you there.”
“Shush,” Chris replied, grinning at the mental image of his lover pinning the poor projectionist against the wall until the rest of the group arrived,” Homer's there.”
Nick shrugged again. “Good for him?”
“Just ask him Nicky. What's the worst that could happen?”
~He could say no~ Nick thought, following Chris out into the warm night. Then Nick would be forced to admit that he wasn't perfect, that he wasn't deserving of love, that he'd be alone... He shook himself away from thoughts like that. The all-pervading depression wasn't enough? He had to actively ponder these things too? When he was attempting to have fun? Nick grabbed the door and held it open for Chris.
Oz ducked under Nick’s arm and made a beeline across the lobby for Darren and Drapes. Malts was nowhere to be seen, Nick noted, glancing around. Probably in the bathroom. Everyone knew about Kirk’s penchant for “emptying the tank” before movies so as not to miss anything. He saw Hank and Pav near the ‘Coming Attractions’ wall, arms around each other’s waists and he shook his head. No subtlety those two. He was startled out of his thoughts by Homer coming up next to him.
“Hej Nick. Where you been all day?” They were sharing a room yet Homer had seen his Captain only a handful of times since they’d left Detroit.
“Oh, around.” Nick scuffed the floor with the toes of his shoe, avoiding Homer’s gaze. They stood in awkward silence before Nick finally spoke again,” What movie are we seeing anyway?”
“Uhm, Batman?” Tomas shrugged. “You know how Chris is.”
“A giant Batman dork?” They joined their teammates in the centre of the lobby and helped Mac dragoon Drapes into waiting in line to pick up their tickets. Darren had specifically made sure that they had tickets to this show, for Ozzie’s sake. Nick stayed at the periphery of the group though, preferring again to isolate himself. Somehow, though, the distance he put between himself and the others physically never matched up to the distance he perceived between them.
Tomas steered his way over to Nick again. “I’m serious, for sure. Are you okay?”
“I’m fine Homer. Honest.” Nick stuffed his hands into his pockets and forced a grin.
Tomas shrugged and let it go. If Nick wanted to talk to him, he would.
~
“Dude, did you see that? He impaled him! With a pencil!”
“Malts shut up, we saw it.”
“You don’t need to tell the whole theatre it was me, Drapes.”
“Quiet!” Darren hissed at his best friends, shooting a sideways glance at the blond goalie sitting next to him. Oz had waited over a year for this film, Mac was damn sure his lover was going to get to enjoy it.
Homer tossed a handful of popcorn at the three of them. “All three of you shush, for sure.” He settled back once they shut up, offering the bag to Nick, who refused, shaking his head. “Come on Nick. It’s for good to you, you know.”
“Salt and butter and grease are good for you?” Nick hissed back, folding his arms across his chest again.
“Put hair on your chest. For sure.”
“I’m good Tomas but thanks.” Nick slumped down and sat with his knees pressed to the back of the seat in front of him. It wasn’t that he wasn’t interested in the movie; he just…didn’t feel like being here. He would much rather have remained back at the hotel, reading or listening to music or something. By himself. He liked being alone, it gave him time to relax and wind down. And he didn’t have to pretend to be perfect when he was all by himself. Loneliness was just part of relaxing, he was used to it. Even when he wanted to be around other people, volunteered to spend time with his friends, he felt alone.
Homer watched him out of the corner of his eye, concerned. Nicky had never been the most sociable guy, but he’d never been distant either. Moreover, he’d never avoided Tomas the way he had been these past several months. It bothered Homer. It scared him too. As much as he hated to admit it to himself, he loved Nick. Anything that was bothering Nick was bound to bother Tomas too.
Nick could feel Tomas staring at him. Homer wasn’t as subtle as he thought he was. Nick bit back a smirk and pretended to focus on Batman’s ‘interrogation’ of the Joker. He wanted to see what the other man would do.
Moments later, something tapped off the side of his head. And then something else. He turned in time to bat the third piece of popcorn away from his face. “What are you doing?”
“My popcorn. I’m throwing it at you,” Homer replied, and bounced another piece off Nick’s nose.
“Well quit it.”
“No.” A fifth piece caromed off Nick’s ear and he subsided back into his seat, scrunching up again and trying to ignore Homer and his fluffy projectiles.
~
Nick picked another kernel out of his hair and threw it at Homer. “I wish you wouldn’t do that. I think more wound up on me than you got to eat.”
Homer had flinched away from the kernel but grinned at Nick. “Kept you entertained, for sure.”
“Kept me annoyed.”
“Are you mad at me?”
“No. You know I can’t be mad at you.” Homer could get away with anything where Nick was concerned and he knew it. He never took advantage of it though, taking lectures from the Captain the same as anyone else on the team. “I’m just grouchy tonight.”
“I noticed,” Homer said. He pulled his shirt over his head and threw it in the general direction of his bag, missed completely and knocked the room phone off the hook. “Oops.”
“Nice one.”
“Shush.” Homer retrieved his wayward clothing and tossed it onto his bag, stepped out of his pants and dropped them on top of the shirt.
“For fuck’s sake, there’s popcorn in my shoes! How did you do that?”
“Eh, no idea.” Homer crawled into bed, realizing as he did so that it would mean relinquishing the remote to Nick.
Nick pushed Tomas over and sat down on the bed, flicking lazily through the channels.
“Mm.” Tomas shoved obligingly and blinked sleepily up at Nick. “I’m going to sleep, maybe we should switch beds?”
“I can move back-“
“No, you’re alright. Just thought you might want the bed to yourself.”
“If you’re okay I’m okay.”
“Mkay.” Homer rolled onto his belly and patted Nick’s knee. “Things are gonna get better for you Nicky. For sure.”
Nick smiled at the other man, feeling oddly touched. “Thanks Tomas.”
~
Nick woke up stupidly early the next morning feeling warmer than usual. He raised his head from the pillow and squinted around, focusing on the bed opposite. There was no one in it, and he realized that he was in Homer’s bed. With, apparently, Homer. ~Must have fallen asleep watching TV~ That didn’t explain why he was covered up. The only thing he could think of was that Tomas must have woken up in the night and covered him up. ~Well, fuck it.~ he thought and curled back up. Might as well catch a bit more sleep, Homer didn’t seem to mind being in the same bed as him.
He felt Homer rustle next to him and sit up, pushing the covers back. Nick lifted up on his elbows to watch him. Tomas waved him back down, saying,” Go back to sleep Nick, I’ll be back in a minute, for sure.”
Alrighty then. He lay back down as Homer disappeared into the bathroom and was sleeping when he came back and crawled back into bed, stretching out on his side, back to back with Nick.
The second time Nick awoke, Homer’s arm was draped over his hip, holding him. Nick grinned into his pillow, Homer always was a cuddler. He found it pleasant, actually. He felt safer now then he had in a very long time. Maybe Homer was right. Maybe things were going to get better.
Ozzie looked up, saw Nick, and motioned with his head. Nick smiled and shrugged in response. Oz flipped him off. Nick stuck his tongue out and proceeded downstairs. To an outsider, it may have looked like a random series of twitches and gestures. To Nick and Chris, however, it was an entire conversation.
“Nick, you should come down here, come on, I know you heard us planning, come out with us.”
“Eh, maybe. You sure you want me to come?”
“Of course you moron. Why else would I have asked? Get your ass down here.”
“Fine. Hang on I'll be right there.”
Ozzie crossed his arms and eyeballed his Captain as Nick walked across the lobby to join them. ”Hurry up; we'll miss the start of the movie!”
“You know full well Darren won't let them start it without you there.”
“Shush,” Chris replied, grinning at the mental image of his lover pinning the poor projectionist against the wall until the rest of the group arrived,” Homer's there.”
Nick shrugged again. “Good for him?”
“Just ask him Nicky. What's the worst that could happen?”
~He could say no~ Nick thought, following Chris out into the warm night. Then Nick would be forced to admit that he wasn't perfect, that he wasn't deserving of love, that he'd be alone... He shook himself away from thoughts like that. The all-pervading depression wasn't enough? He had to actively ponder these things too? When he was attempting to have fun? Nick grabbed the door and held it open for Chris.
Oz ducked under Nick’s arm and made a beeline across the lobby for Darren and Drapes. Malts was nowhere to be seen, Nick noted, glancing around. Probably in the bathroom. Everyone knew about Kirk’s penchant for “emptying the tank” before movies so as not to miss anything. He saw Hank and Pav near the ‘Coming Attractions’ wall, arms around each other’s waists and he shook his head. No subtlety those two. He was startled out of his thoughts by Homer coming up next to him.
“Hej Nick. Where you been all day?” They were sharing a room yet Homer had seen his Captain only a handful of times since they’d left Detroit.
“Oh, around.” Nick scuffed the floor with the toes of his shoe, avoiding Homer’s gaze. They stood in awkward silence before Nick finally spoke again,” What movie are we seeing anyway?”
“Uhm, Batman?” Tomas shrugged. “You know how Chris is.”
“A giant Batman dork?” They joined their teammates in the centre of the lobby and helped Mac dragoon Drapes into waiting in line to pick up their tickets. Darren had specifically made sure that they had tickets to this show, for Ozzie’s sake. Nick stayed at the periphery of the group though, preferring again to isolate himself. Somehow, though, the distance he put between himself and the others physically never matched up to the distance he perceived between them.
Tomas steered his way over to Nick again. “I’m serious, for sure. Are you okay?”
“I’m fine Homer. Honest.” Nick stuffed his hands into his pockets and forced a grin.
Tomas shrugged and let it go. If Nick wanted to talk to him, he would.
~
“Dude, did you see that? He impaled him! With a pencil!”
“Malts shut up, we saw it.”
“You don’t need to tell the whole theatre it was me, Drapes.”
“Quiet!” Darren hissed at his best friends, shooting a sideways glance at the blond goalie sitting next to him. Oz had waited over a year for this film, Mac was damn sure his lover was going to get to enjoy it.
Homer tossed a handful of popcorn at the three of them. “All three of you shush, for sure.” He settled back once they shut up, offering the bag to Nick, who refused, shaking his head. “Come on Nick. It’s for good to you, you know.”
“Salt and butter and grease are good for you?” Nick hissed back, folding his arms across his chest again.
“Put hair on your chest. For sure.”
“I’m good Tomas but thanks.” Nick slumped down and sat with his knees pressed to the back of the seat in front of him. It wasn’t that he wasn’t interested in the movie; he just…didn’t feel like being here. He would much rather have remained back at the hotel, reading or listening to music or something. By himself. He liked being alone, it gave him time to relax and wind down. And he didn’t have to pretend to be perfect when he was all by himself. Loneliness was just part of relaxing, he was used to it. Even when he wanted to be around other people, volunteered to spend time with his friends, he felt alone.
Homer watched him out of the corner of his eye, concerned. Nicky had never been the most sociable guy, but he’d never been distant either. Moreover, he’d never avoided Tomas the way he had been these past several months. It bothered Homer. It scared him too. As much as he hated to admit it to himself, he loved Nick. Anything that was bothering Nick was bound to bother Tomas too.
Nick could feel Tomas staring at him. Homer wasn’t as subtle as he thought he was. Nick bit back a smirk and pretended to focus on Batman’s ‘interrogation’ of the Joker. He wanted to see what the other man would do.
Moments later, something tapped off the side of his head. And then something else. He turned in time to bat the third piece of popcorn away from his face. “What are you doing?”
“My popcorn. I’m throwing it at you,” Homer replied, and bounced another piece off Nick’s nose.
“Well quit it.”
“No.” A fifth piece caromed off Nick’s ear and he subsided back into his seat, scrunching up again and trying to ignore Homer and his fluffy projectiles.
~
Nick picked another kernel out of his hair and threw it at Homer. “I wish you wouldn’t do that. I think more wound up on me than you got to eat.”
Homer had flinched away from the kernel but grinned at Nick. “Kept you entertained, for sure.”
“Kept me annoyed.”
“Are you mad at me?”
“No. You know I can’t be mad at you.” Homer could get away with anything where Nick was concerned and he knew it. He never took advantage of it though, taking lectures from the Captain the same as anyone else on the team. “I’m just grouchy tonight.”
“I noticed,” Homer said. He pulled his shirt over his head and threw it in the general direction of his bag, missed completely and knocked the room phone off the hook. “Oops.”
“Nice one.”
“Shush.” Homer retrieved his wayward clothing and tossed it onto his bag, stepped out of his pants and dropped them on top of the shirt.
“For fuck’s sake, there’s popcorn in my shoes! How did you do that?”
“Eh, no idea.” Homer crawled into bed, realizing as he did so that it would mean relinquishing the remote to Nick.
Nick pushed Tomas over and sat down on the bed, flicking lazily through the channels.
“Mm.” Tomas shoved obligingly and blinked sleepily up at Nick. “I’m going to sleep, maybe we should switch beds?”
“I can move back-“
“No, you’re alright. Just thought you might want the bed to yourself.”
“If you’re okay I’m okay.”
“Mkay.” Homer rolled onto his belly and patted Nick’s knee. “Things are gonna get better for you Nicky. For sure.”
Nick smiled at the other man, feeling oddly touched. “Thanks Tomas.”
~
Nick woke up stupidly early the next morning feeling warmer than usual. He raised his head from the pillow and squinted around, focusing on the bed opposite. There was no one in it, and he realized that he was in Homer’s bed. With, apparently, Homer. ~Must have fallen asleep watching TV~ That didn’t explain why he was covered up. The only thing he could think of was that Tomas must have woken up in the night and covered him up. ~Well, fuck it.~ he thought and curled back up. Might as well catch a bit more sleep, Homer didn’t seem to mind being in the same bed as him.
He felt Homer rustle next to him and sit up, pushing the covers back. Nick lifted up on his elbows to watch him. Tomas waved him back down, saying,” Go back to sleep Nick, I’ll be back in a minute, for sure.”
Alrighty then. He lay back down as Homer disappeared into the bathroom and was sleeping when he came back and crawled back into bed, stretching out on his side, back to back with Nick.
The second time Nick awoke, Homer’s arm was draped over his hip, holding him. Nick grinned into his pillow, Homer always was a cuddler. He found it pleasant, actually. He felt safer now then he had in a very long time. Maybe Homer was right. Maybe things were going to get better.
no subject
Date: 2008-08-27 06:13 pm (UTC)“Malts shut up, we saw it.”
“You don’t need to tell the whole theatre it was me, Drapes.”
“Quiet!” Darren hissed at his best friends
It's funny because almost that exact thing happened with my friends and I when we saw the movie.
Of course Homer is a cuddler! Silly Nick. He should stop being sad and just cuddle with Nick all the time. =]
I loved this! Thanks for sharing.
no subject
Date: 2008-08-27 06:22 pm (UTC)I love that scene. :) And yes, Homer=snuggles
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Date: 2008-08-27 08:07 pm (UTC)