2minsforslashing | Turn To You Part 6 of 7

Title: Turn To You Part 6 of 7
Pairing: Trevor Linden/Markus Naslund
Author:

amyvand25
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: Don't know them, wish I did.
Archived: Eventually at http://www.evilchicas.com with the rest of this series.
Summary: Things are starting to get better thanks to a wise brother.
A/N: Sorry I forgot to post this the other day when I posted it elsewhere. *facepalms*

Trevor's POV-

The past week has been pretty interesting. I've been disowned by my brother, I had a massive panic attack which landed me in the hospital and my parents still aren't talking to me. There is a good side though; two of my good friends, who I never expected, might be getting together as a couple. Another of the good parts is that I have a hot tub now, as well as a custom built jungle gym in my back yard. Jamie and his crew came over, along with some of the guys, to get it all up, so now it'll be all done when the kids get here next week. The best of all is that Markus has been beside me; he's been my rock, and I will never be able to repay him for it.

As I'm sitting at my desk working on some union stuff, I hear a knock on the office door.

"Hey Trev. How's it going in here?" Jamie comes in and sits on the couch next to the computer.

"Good. I cannot wait to soak in that hot tub, and I'm sure Mark's back will love it too when it acts up. We almost ready to give that puppy a test-drive?"

"Yep…just need to fill it, get some sanitizers in there and you should be all set. How's everything going with you two?" I look at him, wondering what the hell he's talking about. "I mean, not that I keep track or anything, but the past few weeks, it seems like there's something not quite right."

"What gives you that idea? We're fine, like we always are. We love each other very much, we've been spending lots of time together, and being with you guys getting the last bits and pieces done before his kids come next week."

"I don't know. Just a feeling. Sorry if I'm wrong or I'm prying, I'm just concerned with the whole being in the hospital thing…and Dean and…" I put my hand on his knee to stop him.

"I know…I appreciate it, James." Just as I lean over to hug him, Markus walks in with a list in his hand.

"Hi Jamie." He turns to talk to me. "I'm off to the store to get a few things. I'm getting some salmon steaks to put on the barbecue…you want to stay for dinner, Jamie?" Mark sits with most of one butt cheek on the arm of my chair, wrapping his arm around my shoulders, and the creepy feeling starts. It's gotten better since being in the hospital, but it still happens sometimes when we touch each other; so sex, cuddling, and other things are still not as good as they were, and still happen very sporadically, which luckily Markus hasn't noticed or just hasn't said anything about yet.

"No, thanks Markus. Stitch is making me a late birthday dinner, since we were so busy last week when I actually had my birthday."

"Hey…we took you out for dinner, had presents; you had a birthday." It was just the four of us at a nice restaurant close by that Markus and I go to every so often, and I've become a friend with the owner over the years. I think he's figured out about us, but he's got a few secrets of his own too, so he's very understanding. Jamie starts to chuckle and so do Markus and I.

"I know. This is with Stitch's parents and her sisters; the other part of the family." I can see the pain in his eyes, talking about parents and family. Our mom and dad are still not speaking to him either, so it was not as festive a birthday as mine was, and I think he's still hurting from it. Markus kisses my cheek, smiling at me; then gets up to head out.

"You want anything that's not on the list?"

"Nope, that's good, love. I'll either be in here or outside when you get back."

"I'll be back shortly. " He cups my face in his palm, then brings it up for a kiss on the mouth, and I'm trying so hard to not flinch or make any kind of facial movement. Even though I've been longing for this all day, the panic and squicks have been getting stronger as the day's gone on. "If you're gone when I get back, Jamie…have a good evening and nice dinner with everyone…" He walks to the door, looks back and gives a little wave, then I hear the front door close.

"Okay…if there's nothing going on, why in the hell were you almost squirming when he was sitting there; and then when he kissed you, I swear you looked like you were going to pass out." Oh shit…if Jamie can see it, I wonder if Markus can too, and just doesn't want to make me feel bad. My eyes begin to fill at the thought of not only Markus being upset, thinking I don’t want him; but also that these feelings will never go away, letting me get back to being happy and showing my partner how much I love him in a physical way. "Trev?" Jamie's puts his hand on my arm, and when I look in his eyes with the concern in them; I can't help it, I burst into tears. He comes over to lean against the desk and rubs my back while I cry with my head in my hands. After he lets me just go for a few minutes, I start to calm down a little, then I put my arms around his waist, and he hugs me.

"I'm sorry, Jamie."

"Trev, what's happening?" He moves back to the couch and I wipe my face, taking a couple of deep breaths.

"It's been like this for a few weeks, and I've been trying to ignore it, but it’s no use. Soon after we got back from seeing Mom and Dad…when Mark and I touch each other, I get a feeling of panic or the creeps. I don't know if he's noticed it, but I hope he hasn't. The last thing I want is for him to think I don't want him, or want to be with him. That's the furthest thing from the truth; I've never loved him more than I have the past few weeks."

"Is that what caused the trip to the hospital, the panic? They said you hyperventilated and passed out, which was why you fell. Was that after you talked to Dean?" I nod and Jamie lets out a sigh that sounds like disgust, and runs his hand through his hair.

"It really started about a week after we got home from Mom and Dad's…it was just small at first, then has been building more and more each day. The day I talked to Dean…" I have to take another deep breath to keep going. "He said all these awful things to me, and I guess it just pushed me over the edge."

"This has to stop. It almost sounds like you're feeling guilty about being with Markus or that this relationship is wrong…"

"But I don't think or feel that."

"Maybe not consciously, but something's going on in that head of yours to make you feel that way. Did this ever happen before you came out to them? In the 3 months before that, did you once not want to touch Markus…kiss him, hug him, anything else physical?"

"No. Our sex life and everything else had always been good. It's not like we were constantly all over each other, but it was really nice. I don't know…maybe this isn't going to work out." The thought of not being with Markus makes me want to lie down and die, but it might be the only way to get rid of this mind/body thing.

"What are you talking about? Are you thinking about breaking up with Markus; that it will help you get over this?"

"I don't know what else to do Jamie. Falling in love with him is the reason that our parents not talking to me or you, our brother has told me that I am no longer welcome in his life and that I'm going to Hell. The worst of all is that I can't even kiss or make love to my partner without worrying that I'm going to break out in a cold sweat or throw up. So maybe if we split up, we can still be friends and we can go on with our lives like before."

"Trevor, that is the biggest bunch of horseshit I've ever heard. I'm going to say this once and once only, do not break up with him to please them; it will be the biggest mistake of your life. In the past you've rarely taken my advice, but you need to please listen to me this time." Maybe I've not taken all of it, but I have taken some of his advice.

"What are you talking about?"

"Oh I don’t know…not getting married to that witch, telling Messier and Keenan to go fuck themselves and keeping your C, a few other choice things." Okay, he has me there. "Markus is the best thing that has happened to you. In the time you've been dating, I have never seen you so happy; and with the kids coming, you might actually get have your own little family…sort of. Trev…don't make him pay for them being closed minded fools." I start to say something in their defense, but Jamie puts up his hand. "No… I still love Mom, Dad and Dean, but I sure don’t like them much right now. I know you're the older brother, but I'm telling you what to do this time. You need to stay with Markus, because you two were meant to be together. If they want to be that way, fuck them; they're missing out on something really great."

"I don't want to lose him; I love him so much…my heart hurts sometimes thinking about how much…" I sit back in my chair with my arm across my face.

"Then you need to keep reminding yourself that this relationship is good…being with him and touching him is a good thing because you love him and he loves you. The only voice you need to listen to, my friend, is your own. I'm not saying that it's going to change completely overnight, but it can't hurt." I sit up and look at him, and he's smiling at me.

"How'd you get so smart?"

"Dr. Phil." He starts to laugh loudly, and I have to crack up too. He reaches over and pulls me into a hug again. "I'm kidding. Remember that I still love you and I'm here for you. Maybe I can make one more call up to Med Hat and see if Dad will talk to me. If not, you stick with me and our friends….we'll make our own family with Markus, the kids….Stitch and her clan. You’re always welcome there, she loves you too."

"Thanks. I'll try that talking to myself thing, it can't hurt…and Markus' birthday is coming up. I wanted to take him away, but with the kids coming two days later, it's going to be dinner and celebrating at home." I feel a little blush come over me, and I'm not sure why.

"Can I ask you something personal? I asked you something like this a while ago…"

"What is it?" Jamie and I have never had secrets so I don't have anything to hide.

"Is he a good lover? I don't need to know the details, and you said before it was a little different from being with a woman, but is he good?" I guess I should answer, we've always shared stories about women in the past….

"I…yeah. He's good. One of the best parts of all is his kiss. I've never been with someone who could kiss like that. I'm not sure what it is but kissing him is almost better than anything else we do."

"Maybe you can try that suggestion thing the next time you go to kiss him. See if it works, if the creepy feeling comes back." I nod in agreement, then I hear the front door slam, and a blond head pokes into the room.

"Hey…I'm back. Trevor…Sweetie, I got you that cake you like. They had the chocolate and the lemon, and I couldn't remember which one was better, so I got a slice of both." Markus smiles at me before he goes back out, and think I want to try Jamie's suggestion; so I call to him.

"Hey Markus?" He comes back in the room.

"Yea, Baby?"

Jamie and I both get up, and he pats me on the arm before he talks to me in almost a whisper. "Call me tomorrow and let me know how things are going, okay?"

"Sure." He squeezes Markus' shoulder as he walks out of my office and the front door shuts. Markus turns to me with a questioning look on his face.

"You two looked kind of serious when I came in, everything okay?" I hold my arms out to him, and he walks into them, wrapping himself around my back. I tell myself that this good, and it does feel so very good. Mine the only voice I need to listen to, and it's telling me that I love how this feels. I move a bit to look into those beautiful blue eyes; and I feel a lump coming into my throat as I wonder how I could have even thought of leaving him. God, I hate it when Jamie's right; but this time I'm so thankful I have him in my life still and I listened to him.

"Everything is fine. We were just chatting a little…and he's going to try to call our parents one more time…see if they have come around yet." Markus lays his head on my shoulder while rubbing my back, and I rest my cheek in his hair. So far this is going well. All I feel is the body heat coming through his light t-shirt past mine to my chest, and my cock starts to twitch a little. I brush my hand through his hair as his hands have moved down to my ass, rubbing gently. So good so far; and he looks up at me with a sweet smile; and I take his mouth with mine very softly. Feeling him kissing me back, I add more pressure then rub my tongue against his lips until his mouth opens and starts to suck my tongue in. After tasting his mouth, I move to his neck, and start to nibble on the spot behind his ear; still telling myself this is feeling really good. So good, my shorts are starting get a little tight in front.

"Oh Baby…that's so wonderful….feels so good." I can feel him getting hard too through his shorts, his crotch against my thigh. I want to do something for him, show him how much I still love and want him. Maybe…just maybe I can try going down on him. I haven't done it in weeks, and I've always really loved doing that for him. I rub my hands under his shirt, playing with his nipples a little, and then I go for his belt. "Trevor?" I look at him, and his eyes are turning that gray color when he gets turned on.

"What, my love?" His hand comes up to touch my face, and he kisses me again so hard I have to hang on to him. He lets me go, and I kneel before him to unbutton and unzip his shorts. Slowly, I push them with his boxer briefs off of his luscious ass until his hard cock slips out and slaps against his stomach. Before I take him in my hand, I close my eyes for a second, playing my new mantra through my brain again; then I lean in to hold his cock in one hand and his balls in the other.

"Please? Baby?" I can barely hear his voice, as I take his tip into my mouth. The pre-cum that's already flowing out hits my taste buds and it's more delicious than I remember. After a few licks and a swirl or two I take him all the way in, holding onto one of his butt cheeks. I feel his hands running through my hair; and it takes just a few minutes before I hear his breath start to get that choppy sound. The hands in my hair begin to grip tight, and he comes really hard with almost a yelp before moaning in Swedish to me. I'm able to swallow most of his cum, and it tastes so good. When I finish licking up the rest, I stand back up and take him in my arms again, pressing my lips against his, sharing his taste with him. I did it…no panic, no squick. Just he and I sharing this intimate time together, and it felt good and so right.

"That was so wonderful." He reaches for my belt, and I take his hands in mine. "What?"

"It's okay, min Älskare. That was all for you. I just wanted to do that to remind you how much I love you."

"But I want to…please?" I take his beautiful face between my hands, and kiss him again softly.

"How about you remind me tonight when we go to bed?" I rub my thumb across his cheek and he nods. "Let's go make dinner, and see what we have left to do on the list to get ready for next week….okay?" He breaks into that smile that always makes me feel like we're the only two people in the world.

"Sounds good, Baby. I love you…so very much. Never forget that." I kneel down to pull up his shorts for him, and he gets dressed; then he holds his hand out to me. I take it, and we walk to the kitchen to get dinner started.

The phone rings while I'm cooking the fish out on the deck, and it must be someone we must know by the animated conversation and the laughter. As I watch him talking, I realize all that I could have lost if I hadn't talked to Jamie this afternoon. I owe my brother a huge thank you gift.